Between Your Ribs
You show me yours, I’ll show you mine?
Hey so this is totally going to be word salad and millions of run on sentences. I am also not a writer so enjoy and if you see a typo, no you didn’t xx
I guess for context about me, I didn’t realize I was queer until I was 20 so I didn’t know this massive part of myself had existed and it didn’t get much clearer for a long time after that either lol. Since then, I have had different relationships, dated around, and grown my queer community as much as humanly possible in which I have learned so much about myself and the relationships around me. Realizing I was queer in my early twenties opened up a whole new world to me for both how I viewed myself in general and as an artist.
Fast forward, 2025 rolled around and after feeling stuck in a long creative rut, I felt a need to connect with people through my work and decided to make something that I felt could potentially merge the two? I started shooting this series at the beginning of 2025 by photographing couples doing what makes them feel close to their partners. In this project, I used 35mm film, polaroids, and digital photography. I photographed nine queer and trans couples in the Brooklyn/NYC area and got to know them over usually an afternoon of coffee, wine, food, games, or just conversation.
There is something quite special and intimate about being welcomed into people’s spaces and the inner-workings of their relationships while also being photographed by a stranger. I am a deeply nosey person so I thoroughly enjoyed perusing through the pictures hung on each person’s apartment walls and the stories they all so graciously shared with me.
My goal with this project was to highlight the beauty in the mundane in a world that continues to ridicule and berate our community. It’s obviously no secret that being queer or trans is not the “traditional lifestyle” for many (loserssss!). The world is fucking burning and everyone is exhausted and you get what I mean. And in recognizing that, sometimes I feel like “Why on Earth am I pursuing and making art when the world is like this right now” After having brief a meltdown, I usually snap out of it and remember that joy and resistance work in tandem and projects like this are more crucial than ever really. I didn’t want any of this to feel polished and manufactured. I guess as unpolished you can be with a camera pointing at you in your personal space. I thought about doing this series for awhile but felt scared of it not amounting to what I envisioned. The imposter syndrome leaped out but I finally took the leap and I was excited to turn this into both a zine and gallery to share with people.
The name Between Your Ribs is based on my perception of queer intimacy at its core: the overwhelming feeling of being with someone and wanting to crawl inside their skin, to see and know every part of a person; to be smothered in the best way; to feel safe; to be tucked into their chest, literally. It may sound vulgar if you haven’t experienced it but it is that visceral. It’s tender but intense and all consuming and incredible and scary and fucking wonderful. Though I only focused on couples for this series, I feel this rings true with loving any queer or trans person in your life even if it is platonically because it’s essentially about being entirely seen.
Prior to meeting, I asked each couple what they love doing together and then we planned on doing just that while i sat back as a witness to the sweet adoration that silently stirs in these moments. Each couple, wildly different, but all sharing something palpable in the air that I couldn’t help but grin like crazy while capturing. This project bought me so much joy to create, especially the time I got to spend with each couple, and I hope people can feel that through these photos.
First, I met with Pierce and Joye for a cozy quiet afternoon in. Both are friends of mine so this was the “test shoot” since it was easy to be candid with them on where I wanted to go with this project despite having very jumbled plans with it. We chatted and hung out while they cuddled and shaved each other’s heads (matching bleached buzzcuts duhhh) and cared for each other in the smallest but most impactful ways.
Second was Madi and Katie. I biked over to Bedstuy to meet them at their local grocery store. One of the things they noted in their form they submitted was that they loved grocery shopping and espically cuddling together any chance they got. We started at the store and then moseyed on over to Madi’s apartment to capture their home routine of getting cozy and entangled together in bed with Holly, their pitty angel. Madi, who is also a photographer, gave me one of their zines they made which warmed my heart. I love shooting with other artists.
“Together we are the silliest boyfriends in Brooklyn. We giggle nonstop and are playful in everything we do. We are disgustingly, stupidly in love and plan to keep it that way. We take turns taking care of one another: I write her poetry and she does my dishes, I walk her dog, and she fixes my dresser. We do the little things with love and we've found that the little things are everything. We handle each other with immense care when the big things roll around too. Wow we are so so so lucky, I'm crying hahah” - Madi & Katie
“Queer intimacy is finding home in a way you were never able to before; it is letting go of an old script and finding new shared language (and creating a whole new vocabulary at times); it is crawling into someones hot wet mouth, curling up in their strange breath, and knowing it's where you belong; it is molding family out of friends and friends out of lovers.”
Madi & Katie
Next, I shot Clarke and Charlie up in Harlem. I met them at Charlie’s place and was greeted by both of them and Charlie’s adorable black cat moose. They had previously shared with me that they loved cooking together so we planned for me to come over and sit in for breakfast with them. They made me a delicious iced coffee and we chatted and got know each other over the next hour or more. I got to witness Moose do tricks for treats and the care Clarke and Charlie show to one another while cooking and eating together. Since this day, I’ve been to many queer community events where I get to catch up with these two including a show Charlie played in their band President Lesbian (they rock!!) where I purchased their merch and now wear it constantly. Clarke and Charlie are inseparable and are so supportive of one another its really beautiful to witness and capture.
“We’ve never been so in love. It made us reconsider a lot of things that we thought weren’t for us & we can’t wait to continue building a life together.”
Clarke & Charlie
Next up, I met up in Williamsburg with Cheyenne & Tiffany. Cheyenne is from Canarsie and Tiffany is from Jersey so we picked a middle meeting place in Marsha P. Johnson Park. Felt like it made sense after Cheyenne said, “I feel close to my partner when she traverses the the entire borough of manhattan to see me in my beloved Brooklyn”. We walked around and chatted while asked every questions under the sun about them and their relationship. They braved the cold windy evening for me and I am forever grateful.
“To me, queer intimacy is a way to live and feel beyond societal margins. it's existing in spite of what the world thinks of you. It's magical and untouchable and gives me a freedom many people live their whole lives without.”
Cheyenne & Tiffany
Next, I went up to Ridgewood to River’s apartment where I was greeted by him and Bailey. These two are the definition of T4T loverboys. Bailey lives in Philly and River lives in NY so they go back and forth seeing each other. River had been talking about how they met and said, “Something about that night made me drive from NY where i live, to Philly where Bailey lives only a week later to see him again. We kept visiting each others cities under the guise of “visiting our friends” until we admitted we were in love two months later.” While shooting, River made me a delicious latte and we got to hangout a little bit before they are started showing me one fo their favorite things to do together acrobatics which they referred to as climbing all over each other. Right there in River’s living room, I watched them doing some lifting and twirling and I was HAPPY to capture the whimsy of it all. We went out on the fire escape where they like to spend time to just talk and be together followed by in the bedroom where they wrestled and embraced one another. While getting to witness all of this all I could think is that this is the exact chaos I wanted for this project. We lastly walked around the park where these two shared more silliness and kisses then you could imagine.
“Early on into us knowing each other they looked at me straight on on said - I’m going to get so good at loving you - and at the time I thought it was a sweet thing to say but I couldn’t have imagined how good it would feel.”
River & Bailey
The next couple I got to hangout with is Lio & Josefina. We met up in Bryant Park since Lio is from NYC and lives nearby. Both of them are very creative and one thing they love to do together is crafting and going on new adventures. They both brought their sketchbooks to the park and I got to watch them draw and be in each other’s company. Josefina drew cute little doodles of all three of us which was adorable. They told em about who they started as friends but Lio confessed their love for Josefina on one drunken night and the rest is history. A gay love story at its finest. After spending time in the park, we went into the New York Public Library to see the new exhibit and wander around. A day filled with lots of art and lots of love.
“I love that we can be best friends and in a relationship that’s my most favorite thing about being in a queer relationship.”
Lio & Josefina
The next couple I got to hangout with was Arden & Rachel. I met them at Arden’s place where we went up to their roof and drank wine while I watched them go through the process of writing music together. Rachel is a singer/songwriter and Arden is a poet and now creative director for Rachel. They make literal amgic together you need to go check Rachel Bochner out on all your streaming platforms. I got to meet Arden’s darling kitty Junie who assisted me on this shoot. Once we got inside Arden’s room we talked more and I got to see all the sweet momentos around their room that had to do with Rachel and their love for one another. I got to learn about a poem Arden wrote about all the contact lenses Rachel had left at their place when they first started sleeping over which they now have in jar next to their bed (pictured below, I’m obsessed). I had the privilege of catching Rachel’s show at Brooklyn Bowl last year where she would steal glances and sing directly to Arden who was a few rows back. It genuinely made my heart melt seeing them be completely enamored with each other in both private and public
“Queer intimacy is feeling like you can exhale even in your most vulnerable states. It’s kissing like you’re hungry and wishing you could undo every bad thing that has ever caused the person you love harm. It’s taking a shower together doing your different hair and skin routines and switching places every so often so neither person gets cold. It’s walking arm in arm in Brooklyn and squeezing each other when you pass another queer couple, because seeing any queer person in love somehow feels like an ode to your own. It’s finally wanting to be seen and then learning what it feels like to be fully witnessed and understood.”
Arden & Rachel
Then, I went up to Washington Heights to meet Raizor & Kitty. We started out talking and doing things they love like reading and playing with legos. This was followed by a stroll around the neighborhood. A truly beautiful and goofy couple. These had a blast together in front of my camera. I truly find one of the most important things in having a partner is having fun together and these two have that down. On the other hand, they also both create a space for one another that is filled with radical trust and the permission to be vulnerable. They really see each other in every way and it was such a pleasure to get a peek into that.
“Our relationship feels like taking the scenic route home by accident. No GPS. Just taking a few right turns, not knowing where you’ll end up but somehow managing to catch the sunset. Beautiful and unexpected.”
Raizor & Kitty
Last but certainly not least, I met Jodi & Leanne at Leanne’s apartment in Bedstuy Once, I arrived Ticket to Ride with Jodi’s dog Pico tucked between them because they had told me they loved playing boards games together. We giggled and gabbed and I got the ask about every piece of ceramics Leanne has on display in her place. I learned they met at a line dancing event and are super similar to one another in ways such as same birthday, both do ceramics, both work in design, and love to cook. They made us some delicious food as well during my time with them which was so lovely and also so enjoyable to watch them goof around in the kitchen together. I could just see how they moved so well around and with each other doing something they loved <3.
“Intimacy for me is deeply rooted in the present. As we are ever changing there is a specific feeling that comes from someone seeing you clearly in a given moment, and I would argue that there is something inherently queer in the understanding that change is constant - that we are not meant to fit in a box and fall within the binary. What makes me feel cared for is having space to change all the while being accepted for the identity I am claiming at any one time.”
Jodi & Leanne
The best thing I got out of this project was the lasting friendships with really incredible people that were so kind to be a part of it. I got to expand my community while making something that truly felt so fulfilling. Studio 21 press, a queer owned press in Brooklyn, made and published my zine which I was over the moon about :) I am so happy I got to hold a gallery for it at Boyfriend Co-op and bring people together to view it and also shop from other queer vendors!! Years ago, I didn’t think I’d have the confidence to make something like this but I am really proud with how it turned out. I hope you enjoy and if you read all of this, thank you sooooo so so much xx
If you wanna keep up with me you can follow my instagram here :) Amanda Bailey Photo